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We need to touch more. The frenzy of modern life has flipped our priorities on their head and, now, something as important as sex has become so remote that it is often out of reach for many weeks at a time. We put the blue light of our screens before human warmth, likes before love and instant messages before words. We have more but we live less; we are better off but we live worse.
We also need to touch better. When it happens, when the moment arises and we get lucky, when our desire for someone finally culminates in physical contact, it often occurs from a place of fear, ego and consumption, resulting in nothing more than a confused and erratic clash of bodies. Sex is a conversation in which we express ourselves to maintain a dialogue; it is a dance, an oasis, a refuge. It has the potential to be a moment suspended in time, where all you need to do is listen and be listened to.
There are many ways to have sex. As many as there are people who do it. Nonetheless, the collective imaginary would suggest otherwise: penetration, in short. Allowing a whole chorus of acts to deteriorate into a single voice turns sex into something weak and empty, when it should be fluid and experimental, guided by instinct and concluded in consent. So if you have never thought about it before, ask yourself why you have sex the way you do. This is the first step.
Besides penetration, there is a huge range of acts that often go unnoticed. Think of the body as a ‘pleasure’ map. There are endless routes to explore and the only thing that matters is having visceral fun and a voracious appetite. The here, now and pleasure. Penetration, sure, but other practices too, without feeling guilt or shame, taking heed of our true desires. Your mouth watering when you lick the skin of the person who clouds your judgment, who you dream of touching. Melting as you caress every inch of their skin, as your lips land here, there and everywhere, delighting in their shivers, devouring their mouth, interlacing your tongues and hands, gazing into their eyes, breathing face-to-face and showing your true selves laid bare, generously giving all that you have.
The pleasure map
Degenitalize everything. The elbow is as important as the mons pubis. There is a place for everything and there are no rules on preference. So once you’ve asked yourself why you have sex the way you do, start to figure out what you actually like, even if you’ve learned that sex always follows the same old tune. In reality, it can be a different performance every time — a translation of your desires, fantasies and needs.
Listen to yourself and trace your own pleasure map. From the roots of your hair to the tips of your toes, you have countless nerve endings to stimulate. Run your hands over every inch of your skin to decipher the sensations it arouses. Need some help?
Oral Sex Balm
Your lips are incredibly sensitive to touch and temperature changes. Using them to explore another body can be a wonderfully meaningful experience. Having an oral sex gel up your sleeve will heighten the sensations of both bodies and enhance the fluidity of your movements so that climax envelops you in an irremediable explosion.
Saliva is a great natural lubricant for stimulating areas that do not self-lubricate or to increase existing lubrication and explore different textures and levels of friction. Make it all water, not just your mouth.
Nipple Play Gel
Hard nipples are a sign of arousal. Awaken this sensitive area by contrasting tingling cold with the body’s warmth. Caress and tickle to cause a change in temperature and see how their hairs stand on end.
Intimate Shimmer Dry Oil
Every body part deserves care and pleasure. Keep your skin hydrated and ready for enjoyment whenever and wherever, whatever the excuse. The dry oil nourishes your skin but dries fast, leaving behind a shimmering mineral trail. Seduction from head to toe.
Finger Play Gel
One of your most powerful pleasure tools is your fingers. Versatile in their ability to go from stiff to mobile, they delight in different textures and temperatures. With practice, they can develop a delectable attention to detail, providing you with hours of fun. Giving pleasure with your hands and fingers is the foundation of good sex.
Intimate Solid Perfume
Your sense of smell is something so primitive that it can awaken the most animal passions inside of us. It is also a very easy way to evoke memories. Make smell your most powerful ally and turn you and your body into an unforgettable experience. Pave your own path to pleasure.
Full Body Massage
Tracing a map of the body without permanently camping out in its capitals is your best bet when the aim is seduction. Run your hands over the nape of their neck and move down to the lower back, thighs, abdomen and ribs. Feel and be felt ― an erotic massage in all its glory.
The most powerful elixirs are kept in small, delicate bottles and are not suitable for everyone. Imagine concentrating all the heat and pleasure of your body in a single point, if your orgasms were so colossal that they swept you up in a tsunami of pleasure, dilating your pupils and leaving you helplessly open-mouthed.
Anal Play Gel
Not all pleasures are for everyone. Being one of the lucky ones has its benefits. This anal sex gel hydrates, calms and takes care of your skin, paving the way to ecstasy…
Warming Massage Oil
Blow to ignite. We are chemical and we are physical. Glide this heat-raising oil onto the skin and blow to heighten the effect. Run your hands over the feet, inner thighs, chest, back...and lick to finish.
SLOW SEX Manifesto
No fiction, no acting, no judgements, no comparisons, no fear, no guilt and no shame. Our pleasure should be ruled by no one but ourselves and starts with self-love, self-respect, self-knowledge and self-acceptance. Pleasure knows no gender and sexual freedom shouldn’t either. Slow Sex claims the freedom to feel and enjoy ourselves beyond any fictitious sexual behaviours.
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